


Spy vs. spy

by Ania



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Halloween, Pranks and Practical Jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-31
Updated: 2014-10-31
Packaged: 2018-02-22 11:58:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2506970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ania/pseuds/Ania
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SHIELD agents take Halloween seriously, even if they are no longer agents.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spy vs. spy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [taliahale](https://archiveofourown.org/users/taliahale/gifts).



Pepper looked up when she heard a knock on the door of her office.  She could see Maria Hill through the glass, looking far less composed than usual.  Pepper gestured her in, worried about what could shake Maria.

"Is there something I need to know about?" Pepper asked, concerned.

"No," Maria said, clicking her tongue as if annoyed with herself.  "I know you aren't his secretary anymore, but can you call Tony?  I need to talk to him, and he didn't answer my call."

"Of course I can.  But, why do you need Tony?"

Maria looked up at the ceiling, refusing to make eye contact with Pepper.  "I need his help."

* * *

Sam and Steve stared at Natasha.  "You tracked us down for this?" Steve asked.

"Look girl, you're scary as hell, and I've got your back in any fight," said Sam.  "But I'm not sure I'm ready to go up against Fury."

"It's not going up against him, per se," Natasha said, trying to sound as reasonable as possible.  "He's expecting it.  In fact, he's welcoming the challenge."

"Do you even know where he is?" Steve asked.

* * *

Maria entered a conference room, where Tony Stark waiting along with two brunette women.  "Mr. Stark, Ms. Foster," she said, nodding to the people she knew.  She turned toward the second brunette.

"This is Darcy Lewis, my intern," said Jane.

"We invited her along for her expertise," said Tony. "She's come up with some pretty good ideas so far, even if she doesn't agree with me about the orchestra."

"What can I say, I'm pretty devious," said Darcy.

"We have to find him first," said Maria.  "Then we can decide our plan of attack."

"Already working on it, cupcake.  We're just spitballing here.  You should join in.  I don't know what you'll contribute; you aren't enough fun. At least you had the good sense to call me in."

A beep sounded, interrupting Tony before he could gain full speed.  Jane looked down at a device in her hand.  "We've triangulated his position using CERN satellites."

Maria frowned at her.  "That's too easy."

"Not when you've got our tech," replied Tony, throwing an arm around Maria's shoulders.

She glared at it coldly until he removed the arm.

"See, no fun."

* * *

Maria ducked, narrowly missing getting hit with Captain America's shield.  He missed on purpose, but not by much.  Enough to make her lose her shot.  So, she shot at him instead. It seemed like a reasonable reaction at the time.

Darcy and Jane ducked behind a large boulder. "I think ... we're just gonna ... go back to the car now," Darcy said, gesturing with one thumb.  Jane nodded frantically behind her.  "Have fun with your quarry fight!"

Iron Man and Falcon grappled with each other up in the sky.  "Hey bird man, this is our prank!  You and stars and stripes down there need to back off!"

"Gonna tell Black Widow to back off too?"

Natasha was aiming a can of silly string at Fury, who stared her down through his sunglasses.  "Just hold still, sir, and this will be over quick."

"Not a very creative trick," said Fury.  Natasha kept her breathing steady. She wouldn't let him psyche her out.

She pushed down on the trigger, just as Iron Man managed to get into position and release a payload of eggs.  Both spattered against Captain America's shield, which no one had noticed landing next to Fury during the fray.  No one except Fury himself, that is.

"Better luck next year," he said, lowering the shield and propping one edge on the dusty ground.  He lounged against it, looking as if he hadn't been standing in the middle of a fight for fifteen minutes.  "I expect candy from all of you to show up at my safe house before midnight."

He walked off, coat flapping in the breeze.  They all took comfort in the fact that it was no longer as dramatic without his black trench coat.

"Do y'all really do that every year?" asked Sam, landing gently from the sky.

"And how did you not invite me before?" asked Tony, landing right beside him. "Guess what, I'm not going to invite you to my next thing." He turned to Sam, pointedly ignoring the former agents. "You should come out to Stark Tower.  I've got a friend you should meet.  He's a military guy too."


End file.
